Second Chances

It will never be too late. Pasts are meant to teach you something worthwhile in the future. It may be a cliche, but you have to believe that everything that transpires altogether at this very moment, however unthinkable it may be, are all occurring for a purpose... a very important purpose that are meant to unfold that could be as early as tomorrow. You don't have to rush everything. All you need is bear patience.

Believe that you are not too old to alter your system. You are created as you are special. You are not being prevented to take second chances. Or a third, a fourth, until you perfected your existence. Do not be afraid to take unimaginable risks, as your life does not end today. God loves you so much that He can forgive you endlessly. And He will not stop loving you even until you learn how to love Him.

Do not stop believing even if you are afraid. Fear is something you conquer with your unending search of yourself, with love, trust and faith. Never stop trying. Never retire. Never retreat. Never be afraid of knowing what you still do not know. Allow yourself to take long shots, throw punches in the dark, walk alone and cry before the rest of the world.

Allow yourself to be forgiven by yourself.

***

I used to refuse giving second chances. Never did I ask for it. I used to believe that the here and now is to precious to allow repetition. I remember arguing that devisions to love, or not to love, or to stop loving, should be done under the consideration of forever. Then, after quite some time of not feeling loved, I stopped stopped believing at forever, and start attesting that forever is meant to be broken, if not by selfishness, then by time. Given all these things, I had equated love as an element that races, if not competes with, forever. At the end of the line, neither love nor forever wins the race, since both have destructed each other even before any one of the reaches the finish line.

Then the finish line vanished because forever died, and love, because of all its self-imposed promises, became incapable of being endless. All I believed transformed into vagueness; everything was warped into vacuum.

It was the context of these perceptions, during my self-acclaimed solitude, when I started substituting love with sacrifice. I was happily shedding suffering out of denial to the existence of love. My soul then became wearing of harboring sacrifice at one hand, and denying love on the other. I don't want to suffer anymore. I just want to be happy. Then love gave me a second chance.

But what is love? And who is to love?

Beneath my unlearning mind, I found a tentative answer: Everything and everyone.

Let me start with that.